Viral riddles

Viral riddles

Forwards I am heavy backwards I am not.
What am I?

Answer

A ton. (ton ==> not)

What happened to the dog that swallowed a firefly?

Answer

It got de-light-ed.

The product of the first twelve positive integers is divisible by all of the following EXCEPT
(A) 210
(B) 88
(C) 75
(D) 60
(E) 34

Answer

34

I am owned by every man, though my length differs. Their wives uses me after getting married.
What am I?

Answer

Last Name.

There is Three Adventurers and they come up to an apple tree. There are 3 apples (and only 3) in the tree. They each take 1 apple and there are 2 apples left. How is that possible? (No, it's not they all took the same apple at the same time.)

Answer

There was only 1 guy, his name was Three Adventurers.

If you have three oranges and you take away two, how many will you have?

Answer

Two. The two you took.

My thunder comes before the lightning. My lightning comes before the clouds. My rain dries all the land it touches.
What am I?

Answer

A volcano.

Why was the math book sad?

Answer

It had too many problems.

You find a fake stone in Ireland, what do you call it?

Answer

A Shamrock

A woman enters a large metal tube. She is overcome with fear and clenches her boyfriend’s hand tightly. She is visibly shaken. Her boyfriend gently rubs her arms and speaks softly to her, but is unaffected himself. A few hours later, the woman’s boyfriend tells her that it’s time to go and her torment ends.
What was happening to the woman?

Answer

The woman is terrified of flying but must travel to see a dying relative and this adds to her stress level. Her boyfriend does his best to comfort her during the few hours of the flight.

What do you call a kitten which drinks lemonade?

Answer

A sour puss.

Where do animals go when they loose their tails?

Answer

To the retail (re-tail) store.

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